Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Once in a lifetime...


Cropping her existence... 
... life is a showcase... 
The beautiful reels have been chosen
The ugly reels....discarded...

For how long?

Once in a lifetime..
the 'real' emerges...
Like a healing wound....
...the layers peeling off

She smiles.....no more, at the lens
Her smiles emanate from the core..
She smiles....at the overwhelming, enthusing maze...
enveloping her...
not like a behemothian, lusty monster...
but, like a caressing being...

Once in a lifetime...
She enjoys silence...
She finds herself...
Craves to be held....and loved...
Yes, she loves....
She has known hatred...
But, she has known love too...

Her lips are naked...so is her soul....
Erotic imagery put aside
She lives...
She lives now...

She dies everyday...bit by bit...
Time swallows her..
Yet she lives....

Guarded by the shoulders of love...
A quiet flame emerges within her.... warm and tender...
yet, soothing....


Once in a lifetime...
The love that she had craved for...
Returns her innocence....
No, it does not snatch away her pride...
It paints her blanched soul, instead...
...in hues she has never seen or heard of....

She lives in him... and he..in her...

For how long?











Thursday, November 28, 2013

From the narcissistic liberal woman's diary...








Her mirrors ..... They gift her the fragrance of youth.... 

Of the vivacious soul that she is....

Her admirers......They promise how they will light up her future....

And adorn her life with hope...

Her life.....It is a moving collage of moments...

Some, which have catapulted her to the zenith of joy...

The rest...

A pack of nauseating lies...carefully wrapped with fake affection...

Glitters and glitz apart...........She lives...and loves....

The 'narcissistic liberal woman'.... She calls herself by that name.... 

And laughs....loud and clear enough to penetrate the icy souls that have ripped her faith apart....

Laughs ....reverberating....the echoes intimidating them.....

The ones who hide now, beneath the hide of apathy....

She laughs again, this time, at her own naive self.....

She then looks back at the moments that she has traversed....

Nostalgia....she calls it....

Narcissism....they call it....

The memories that have spoken to her, touched her, felt her, tasted her sweet balmy kisses...

And melted in her soft arms...caressing her soul...and satiating her body...

The memories..... which she must forget... because she is liberal..... they say...

The memories .....which will not haunt her....because she is narcissistic, they say...

The memories...however, remain....


The memories ....of a narcissistic liberal woman....










Sunday, November 24, 2013

The teardrop





The teardrop --- 

Stemming from the most savage pain....

Draining your heart of its deepest woes...

Verbose in expression.......yet silent 

Pregnant with meaning, yet obscure....

Invisible in the rain, yet adding to its gloom...

Drenching the suicide note, which you have written before your soul departs.....

The teardrop...... 

Cleansing your heart....yet leaving you hollow.... devoid of life.... 






Saturday, November 23, 2013

Reflections...





The disease that kills you....

The sword that ruptures the bubble of your happiness.... that you had believed in....

The sea that swallows your being and throws you back on the beach...stripped of life, of joy....

The vulture that tears into your flesh....and rips you apart ...alive.... till death...

The noose that you tie.....to strangle....and torture yourself.... till your soul leaves your body, unaccompanied...

The rope that gives away...while you rested your faith in it...as you were conquering the peaks of your life....

The parasite...the leech... that drains you of blood....and leaves you ...a lesser being....

The concubine who lay beside you yesterday.....adored and made love.....but is gone, today...

The ghouls of the night....who don't let you sleep....

The speeding train which has no clue who lies on its tracks.....waiting to be be-headed and mangled....

The earth which nourishes you....but can, in a moment's time.....devastate you...

The airplane that soars above ......but comes crashing down...keeping its promise with Death...

The crater that devours you before you realize you are no more....

Yes, I can name them all............ 'Love'...


You can call them by 'Faith', or 'Trust', too.....




Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Black and White



I woke up early today….. but, what a pity!!! It was a day, completely devoid of colors.  Yes! All black and white………..like a checkerboard.  The feeling was as if I was hit by a speeding train…Head on.
 
Was it just me? I wondered. Or was it everyone else, as well, who was experiencing this? I was not colorblind, not that I was aware of, and not to this extent, anyway.  Then, what was it?

I lived alone - a recent victim of global commercialization- single, a new recruit in a new city, with practically no friends, and obviously, no friendly neighbor either.  It had just been a month since I had come to this city. And now even the colors seemed to have abandoned me. The reds, greens, violets and blues, seemed to have revolted.

My chores done, I dressed myself up for another hard day at work. As I stepped outside my flat, I was still dazed. What did I see all around me? There must be something wrong with me. This must be some medical condition I was suffering from. I will definitely visit a doctor today, I vowed. Was it for real? I could not ask a passerby, for fear of being branded, ‘crazy’, or being laughed at. I realized the full impact of the situation.



Everything was in shades of black and white. The sky was overcast. The greens around me had turned grey. The birds which engaged in their routine cacophony were all blanched. So very gloomy was the scene that I felt lost even amidst an otherwise romantic weather, sprinkled with a light drizzle. Oh wait! When was the last time I had experienced ‘romance’? I do not remember. Not, with all the work around me, and this new job, which was already extracting the last ounce of ‘life’ from me?

As I stood in front of my flat, I was petrified. Were the hues lost forever? What will happen now? Will I never witness the glistening cyan of a peacock’s neck again? Was the pink sunset gone for good? Will the carnations, the violets and the roses never return to their colorful selves? What will the poet’s pen be inspired by?

What will happen to the painter’s easel? Is it of no use anymore? Will the oranges be ‘orange’ no more? Will the apples be a mere darker shade of grey? Will the rainbow never appear again? Most importantly, was this happening to me alone, or were the others around me in a blanched world too?



Suddenly, a car drove up in front of me, and the windows rolled down. It was my boss, who was beaming.

“Hi Tamara”, he said.

“Hi Sir.”

“Did you see what happened? Isn’t it amazing?”

“Sir ! do you mean, I am not the only one who cannot see the colors this morning?”

“Oh ! Yes, Tamara. Haven’t you watched the morning news today?"

“I haven’t had the time to buy a TV yet, sir. It’s just been a month since I have been here. I am sure you understand.”

“Oh well, then get in the car, I am sure you’re confused, and a ride to the office won’t harm you.”

I was stunned. He was definitely happy today. Quite unlike his usual bitter self.
I got in the car, beside my boss, as he drove up the road towards our office.

“So, what is this all about, Sir? Is it a conspiracy?”

“It is a compromise, young lady.”

“A compromise?”

“Yes, young lady. The world leaders along with the leading corporate honchos, entrepreneurs and eminent scientists of the world have decided to make the world completely colorless. Today is the first day of their experiment, and in the subsequent days, we will see a world totally blanched of color.”

“What !!! What do you mean, Sir?”

“Yes, Tamara. The world will go black and white. It already has.”

“But why???”

“Well…because, it is necessary to strengthen the world economy. Do you have any idea about the money and time that we waste on colors, or because of colors? What’s the golden rule of any stable economy or for that matter the corporate world? “Profit” is the magic word, Tamara. And, the world has decided to do away with whatever is not directly related to ‘profit’. To put it simply, ‘Whatever does not rake in money for the enterprise, has to go. Color is not necessary anymore. So, we simply have to bid it goodbye.”



“But, this is not an explanation. What about art? What about beauty? What is a world without colors anyway?"

“It is all about optimization. No color means, less wastage of time on meaningless TV shows on color TVs, and little involvement on the internet, which leads to higher productivity. Besides, now people don’t have to spend hours deciding which color looks good on them, when it comes to clothing. No color means less investment on paints. Also, a colorless world means an end to racism.”

“But, racism is about a state of mind, Sir. It can exist even without colors. This is no excuse for draining out all colors from the world!!!”

“Hahaha!!! Tamara, you’re still young. Wait till you get into the grind. There is no place for anything that isn’t immediately profitable, and color is not. It is as simple, as that.”

“But, Sir, color is necessary for life, and there is a life beyond ‘profit’. What about the movies, the scores of symbolism which depend on color? What about the blue skies which will never welcome us again, and the green forests where we will never find peace again? This is not just highly selfish but a self destructive proposition, altogether. I mean, how could this be?”  I hollered at the top of my lungs, and as I did so, I felt someone jerking me. 



As I woke up with a start, I realized it was my colleague, Sandra, who was sitting beside me. We were in the last row, amidst a very crucial seminar on ‘World economy and its effects’, which was being attended by all employees and the senior-most authorities of our enterprise.  Sandra smiled at me sheepishly. “Dozed off eh? What a boring seminar! I’m sure you’re overworked…” , she whispered. Embarrassed and still trying to gauge what was happening around me, I excused myself and made my way to the ladies’ restroom.

As I stood there washing my face, completely dumbfounded, by the sheer absurdity of my dream, something struck me.  I realized, I was overworked, indeed. The black and white collage of my dream - the eerie morning and the colorless world was gone, but had left its footprints in the sands of my mind and my soul. I decided, I needed a break from this monotony and needed to get back to my world of colors. I decided to be free.

Monday, July 9, 2012

It's raining...




It's raining...
The raindrops are so cold...

It's raining...
Bringing joy to the young and old...

It's raining...
After such a long, long time...

It's raining...
And making me sing with joy and chime...

It's raining...
Making me feel ... Oh! so whole !!!




It's raining...
And it's really cleansing my soul...

It's raining...
Making me feel so alive again !!!

It's raining...
Making me forget my strife and pain...

It's raining...
And soaking the whole town through!!!

It's raining...
And making us all feel new !!!



Sunday, March 25, 2012

Moments



When the early morning sunshine glides through the window,
brightening the rheumy world,
enlivening the soul,
and painting it with its kaleidoscopic hues.....



When the sudden evening shower smudges the beauty of the sensual, luscious dusk
adorned by street-lights...
dim , beside her magnetic self.....




When the intoxicating smell of sodden earth mingles with the aroma of caffeine,
and the magic fuses with the harmony of 'pitter patter' on the roof...



When the subtle breeze hugs me,
arousing me with its tender touch and light kisses all over,
caressing me like an amorous lover...

When the misty and wintry dawn,
captures the bliss of life in its sweet breath...



When the impenetrable greens of the woods,
come alive with the chiming chirps of birds...

When the fluttering butterflies,
emanate their enigmatic charm, their essence and energy,
lifting the spirits of one and all.....



It is then, that I feel, moments make life....

A series of pulsating, throbbing moments.........